Home BE WISE Destructive Response #2 – Belittling

Destructive Response #2 – Belittling

written by Kristin Sherry August 31, 2018
careers
Kristin Sherry

By Kristin Sherry

Founder of Virtus Career Consulting, speaker and author of the career empowerment book

Making someone feel unimportant. There’s no one-size-fits-all reason why people belittle others. Some people are unaware of their behavior and may say a person is too sensitive, or dismiss it as humor if brought up. People may belittle because they have unresolved anger toward a person. Other times the behavior is rooted in insecurity; putting others down to lift themselves up. Regardless, it’s important to realize belittling behavior destroys relationships. Thoughts that lead to belittling: • I’m going to make you look like a fool • I’m going to show your idea doesn’t matter To overcome belittling: REFLECT. • Have I been accused of putting someone down? Do I tend to rationalize it? • Do I have unresolved resentment toward this person? • Am I struggling with insecurities this person triggers? REFRAME. • “He/She is being so sensitive.” • Try: “Maybe I’m not coming across as I intend.” CHOOSE. Explore a more respectful and tactful way to communicate. Evaluate if something should even be said. T.H.I.N.K.: Is it True, Helpful, Inspiring, Necessary, Kind? Commit to REFLECT, REFRAME, and CHOOSE a new behavior.

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